Serena: It's a snub from one party, B. Plus what's the big deal anyway? You don't even like Asher.
Blair: I didn't like last season's Louis Vuitton patchwork bag either, but that doesn't mean I want to see it all over town on Jenny Humphrey's arm.
Blair: What do you say we have a girls' night out tonight?
Serena: Oh, I'm sorry. I can't. I have dinner with the family.
Blair: Let me remind you of a little promise you made. "Don't go to France. I'll be there for you."
Serena: I'm really sorry I've been distant, but things will be better soon, I promise.
Blair: Obviously starting tomorrow...
Serena: Hey. What's wrong? You look stressed, even for you.
Dan: I'm still worried about Jenny.
Blair: You mean because she's self-obsessed, self-serving, self-centered, self...
Dan: No. No, I wish it was about her and her ... self ... But it's more about who she's with. I can't get through to her. I tried, and she just completely blew me off. And she dissed my pants.
Blair: Maybe I underestimated her.
Serena: She's just going through a phase. We all went through it... And apparently, some of us still are in it...
Blair: All that matters to someone like Jenny right now are the four Gs: Guys, Girlfriends and Gossip Girl.
Serena: It's true. Don't feel bad. Unless it's coming from one of them, she's not gonna hear it.
Blair: Dan Humphrey. Just who I hate to admit I was looking for. You're dirty!
Dan: Wha... Uh, what are you talking about?
Blair: Cheating, drinking, drugs, it's all fair game. But outing your sister's boyfriend is dark. How did squeaky-clean Humphrey even come up with that?
Dan: I didn't come up with anything.
Blair: Oh my God, you know something. Spill it.
Dan: Yeah, I might have seen Asher kissing another guy.
Blair: So it's true? Who was he kissing?
Dan: I don't know. I don't... I don't know. I couldn't see. But what does that even matter?
Blair: Right now Gossip Girl's credibility is the same as Tinsley Mortimer's after a few martinis. But if I can prove that his duplicity is more than just a rumor, then they'll break up. That's what you want, isn't it?
Dan: Well yeah, I guess. Yeah...
Blair: Asher's just using your sister as a cover. It's your brotherly duty to save her from becoming the next Katie Holmes.
Dan: And you're in this to help Jenny?
Blair: Motive is irrelevant as long as our endgame is the same.
Dan: No, Blair, this is not a game to me, okay? I don't want her to get hurt.
Blair: Well, you should've thought that through before you told all of Manhattan that Jenny's a glorified hag.
Dan: You know what? I... You're on your own. I'm done.
Blair: Suit yourself.